Death Before Dragons Bonus: Interview with Col. Willard

If you’ve read my Death Before Dragons urban fantasy series, you’ve met Val’s boss Colonel Willard (and her cat Maggie).

The new prequel adventure Mist and Magic shows the story of how Val first came to work for the somewhat testy Willard, so I thought it would be interesting to interview her.

I asked on Facebook for some questions, so most of these are from you guys. Thanks for reading along!

Interview with Colonel Willard

Greetings, Colonel Willard. You may have heard that there’s a new adventure coming out that shows how you and Val Thorvald first met. To celebrate the release, I’d like to do an interview of you for your fans. Would you mind answering a few questions?

My what?

Fans. They’ve been reading along with the stories I’ve been printing. Of course, Val, Sindari, and especially Lord Zavryd the dragon have the most fans, but a few people are curious about you.

You’re from the press? Who let you in this office? Do you have clearance?

Yes, I’m cleared.

*suspicious squint*

As I said, we’ve been covering the story of Val, the dragons, and how your office works to protect the citizens of the Pacific Northwest from magical beings with ill intent toward humans. Our readers would like to know more about you.

If any of that was happening, it would all be classified. Who’s your source?

I’ve learned that goblins get chatty if you give them espresso.

Gondo? I’m going to wring his green neck.

There’s no need for that, Colonel. As you can see, I do have clearance from the government. And I only have a few questions. This interview won’t take long at all.

I don’t recognize this documentation. I’m going to have to call my superiors.

There’s no need to get them involved. Look, I’ll do you a favor if you just answer these questions.

I don’t take bribes. I’m going to throw you out of here, and Gondo will follow right after.

What if I cat sit for you? I understand you have a hard time finding boarding facilities that will accept Maggie. She’s a touch vocal, isn’t she?

*less decipherable squint*

I’ll give you two nights of free cat sitting if you answer my questions. 

A week.

Three nights.

Two weeks.

Uh, a week is good. I can… buy ear plugs, I guess.

As long as you pet Maggie, feed her, appropriately worship her, and don’t bring any tigers into the apartment, you’ll be fine. Ask your questions. I can’t speak about anything that’s classified.

Okay, let’s ask some personal questions then. They’re not classified, I assume.

You want to pry into my personal life?

Our readers want to know about you.

I’m going to need one week of cat sitting every year for this. On the off chance I ever get time to take vacations.

Right, okay. First question. Cindy and Jackie and several others would like to know how you learned about the supernatural world and what your first experience with it was.

The day after I graduated from high school, I signed up for the army. Bless my mother and our community, but I’d grown up poor as dirt and watched too many friends turn into drug addicts and end up in jail, so I wanted out of there.

When I maxed the ASVAB, my recruiter suggested a career in Signal or Intelligence. I’d always liked puzzles and solving problems, so I became an Intel Analyst.

I was in for about five years and aware that there were supposedly non-human beings here on Earth, but I didn’t have firsthand experience until I was sent out to investigate a winery, of all things, in the foothills of Southern Arizona. I was stationed at Ft. Huachuca at the time. Everybody had been killed by mountain lions, including the owner’s family and their young daughters.

It was supposed to look like lion shifters had been responsible, as some were living in the area. But we poked around and learned that a wizard, who had claimed a few thousand acres in the foothills for himself and didn’t like shifters for neighbors, had used magic to compel real mountain lions to attack. When we hunted him down, we found a bunch of wine he’d stolen from the family in his cave, along with some grisly souvenirs. He was half-ogre half-perv.

Honestly, the whole encounter disturbed me a lot, and that’s when I put in for drill sergeant training. But I heard from old colleagues about more cases, more magical beings coming into the world, and I felt like a coward for having fled. I’d finished my bachelor’s degree by then, so I applied for OCS and, after I graduated, I returned to Intelligence.

That’s what I’ve been doing ever since. I passed up a chance to become a battalion commander for this job, because I didn’t want to spend the rest of my life organizing personnel. I knew this would keep me solving problems and figuring out puzzles.

Louisa wants to know how you relax besides working out. Are you a cheeseboard with slippers and a robe kinda lady?

I don’t snack between meals or eat any cheeses ripened with mold or aged out of a sane person’s pocketbook. In the evening, after a good run, I’ll kick back in my reading chair with a book and my cat.

Ebook or physical book?

I don’t do ebooks. I like big history and science books that I can underline and makes notes in and dog-ear. That’s all slow and awkward on an e-reader.

Ellen asks what you’re avoiding by working out so hard?

Nothing. Fitness evaluations are part of being in the army, and if you want to make it to the upper ranks as a woman, you have to be twice as qualified as your male counterparts to be considered. It’s not fair, but it is what it is.

Can you tell us a bit about Val? This comes up, at least from Val’s point of view, in the new Mist and Magic adventure, but Melissa asks, “What did you think of Val the first time you encountered her?”

That my predecessor, Colonel Hobbs, had been insane to employ her.

I read through her record, saw how little regard she had for following rules and obeying authority, and was positive she’d get our whole unit in trouble if we kept giving her gigs.

Years later, I’m still not positive she won’t, but she has more magical trinkets and weapons than anyone else on the West Coast, and she knows how to use them. I finally decided it was better to have her close, where I could keep an eye on her, than let her run around bucking the law as a damn freelancer.

Marion asks if you realize Val is under paid?

Underpaid? Shit, she makes more than I do. Civilian contractors are coddled.

Francis asks about your mental coping methods for dealing with Val and if you have a spiritual side.

I’ve had enough commands at this point that I’m used to dealing with all kinds of subordinates. Dealing with people getting killed because we weren’t quick enough to track down and take out a bad guy is harder to stomach. Yes, having my faith helps with that to some extent. And it’s one of the few things I have in common with my mother these days—she regularly reminds me that she’ll kick my ass if she finds out I’m not going to church.

Can she kick your ass? You’re kind of tough.

Mothers have super powers. Irk them at your own peril.

Let’s finish up with something fun. Meagan asks, “How did Willard meet her cat, why did she decide that was the cat for her, and why did she choose that name?”

I decided a long time ago not to have any pets. I’m single, work long hours, and get deployed often. I shouldn’t have a plant much less an animal.

But I was investigating a series of murders with an otherworldly tie-in and kept butting heads with an obnoxious journalist who insisted on snooping around and putting herself in danger. You know how writers are. *squint*

Do you have something in your eye, Colonel Willard? You keep squinting. It might only be allergies or a simple irritation, but it could signal a more deleterious condition.

It’s an irritation all right. Anyway, the journalist ran an article detailing how a cult of humans worshipping a vampire were responsible for the murders—they were doing sacrifices for their undead god. She was right, but they killed her for exposing them.

We found her body the same night we were arresting the cult members. And we found her terrified cat under the bed in the apartment. It was actually the neighbors complaining of her screeches that led to us finding the body.

I’d briefly met—and heard—Maggie days earlier when I’d been trying to warn the journalist to back off the investigation. I wouldn’t say that we’d bonded, but since I’d failed to deal with the cultists in time to save her owner, I felt obligated to find a good home for her. I didn’t want to dump her off at the Humane Society.

I put out feelers and tried to find cat lovers who didn’t mind a somewhat tempestuous feline, but she doesn’t get along well with most other animals—or most people. A few optimistic souls took her but ended up bringing her back. I decided that wasn’t good for Maggie and that she would stay with me until such time as a perfect match could be found.

And how long ago was that?

Four years.

It’s possible she found her perfect match.

*Willard starts to squint but catches herself*

One last question from A: What’s so special about Willard’s given name that she’s grateful nobody under her command knows of it?

It’s not special so much as it’s… a creative spelling. I was born in the 70s, and my mother is very country. That’s all I’m going to say.

I could probably find your records.

See story above about what happens in this city to nosy journalists.

Right. We’ll just leave it at that then.

~

Other bonuses from the series:

• Interview with the magical tiger Sindari
• Free novelette: The Forbidden Ground
• Bonus scene: “Yeah, Relaxingly”

Haven’t read the books yet? Start with Mist and Magic (the prequel) or Book 1 Sinister Magic.